name Zuko — series Avatar: the Last Airbender — moonblessing Sanguis residence Level 2 — roommatesTamaki + Hikaru + Kaoru — work busboy at Niisan's Teppanyaki
[ She doesn't bother responding, he'd no doubt pester her about this when she was in his presence so there was no point in drawing it out over text. Azula had already been half-way to his shared apartment when he gave her permission to be there, taking little time to show up at his door. She leans against the doorframe after knocking obnoxiously on it, obviously a little disheveled from exhaustion-- she'd been torturing herself for weeks and finally decided she trusted Zuko enough to ask for reprieve. ]
[ Zuko expected her to be quick, knowing Azula, but not that quick. He’d just showered before she texted, his newly short hair still damp and messy, and was freshly dressed just in time for her desperate knock. He opens the door wearing a soft, confused scowl, no harsher than his natural, usual scowls — but with some amount of concern, seeing her now. He wasn’t just surprised with her speed, of course; he’s confused and curious what could possibly be on her mind, have her so visibly on edge. It sounded so urgent, which is unusual for his sister... She’d never said she needed anyone, he’d never considered her admitting it, ever self-sufficient in his eyes by virtue of her genius, and if she said not to make a big deal out of it, that probably means it’s a big deal.
Her disheveled look was not typical of her, either, and at the sight of her a vague thought crosses his mind on why that might be, what she might need him for, also starved of Chroma this Sanguis moon himself, as usual... Suffering, as they once put it. But it’s a strange and feral blip of his heightened imagination that he quickly lets float away, discards as illogical, implausible, odd, just the influence of the moon, some random passing dark thought... he’d rather stay willfully ignorant. His heart’s beating a little faster as he opens the door, either from the lingering heat of his shower or the mounting mystery of his sister’s desperation. He doesn’t say anything to her as he lets her in, merely seeks her frazzled gaze. ]
[ The smell of him hits her first, sensitive to the fresh scent of whatever fruity shampoo he had used, making her acutely aware of the trim his hair received. It makes her harsh expression soften immediately, Zuko had been growing it out for a while back home but seeing him like this reminded her of the last time they got along. So long ago, Lunatia only giving her a glimpse of what they'd never have, a strange connection she never knew she wanted. She realizes what she's doing, nearly gawking, tucking dark hair behind her ear before she scoots past him into the apartment.
Azula lets out a breath when he can't see her face, rolling her shoulders back as she gathers herself, reminds herself why she bothered to come at all. When she offered him Sanguis help before, his response had surprised her-- give an inch, take a mile. She stumbled on the wrong idiot to take advantage of at first, she should have just went to the one she knew how to manipulate her entire life.
But this was... something else, no desire to taunt or tease, a genuine need that she couldn't trust with anyone else. The quick end to what she had with Yamamoto and an inability to get around her mind-numbing whatever-it-was with Jude left her with little options, unable to fill the void with another stranger out of stubbornness to not fully succumb to Lunatia's curse. Building relationships was hard, it was always going to be hard for her, invisible barriers keeping her from connecting. Azula makes a beeline for the couch, dropping dramatically into the cushions before settling in. Now, she'll watch him, patting the cushion beside her. ]
Come here.
Edited (ha ha typo because i always gotta x2 in your inbox) 2020-12-12 03:48 (UTC)
let’s say we’re extending our gratification lol
[ Something is strange, and he can’t quite put his finger on it. Something in the air — in their silence — in her movements, a slip of dark hair gingerly tucked away by long sharp nails, slender shoulders relaxing as she passes, the regal effect of her spread across their fancy furniture like she owns the place, the way she’d sit anywhere... All things he notices, but thinks little of, too mystified by the meaning of her visit. For how urgent she’d made it seem, she’s now acting acting rather cool. It’s confusing. His gaze following her a moment longer than he does, after a beat he comes to join her on the couch as told. His eyes are slightly narrowed, brow knitted, on edge both inwardly and on the seat of the couch beside her. His tone isn’t so much accusatory, those sharp-toned suspicious days have long since smoothed somewhat in Lunatia... but there’s an edge to his voice, as well, tenuous yet direct. ]
[ Defensive. Her fingers twitch but she stops before hands curl into fists, keeping herself calm despite the urges she was trying to keep buried. Weeks of having a plethora of chroma had made the sudden rip of it more jolting, harder to go without than when she'd first arrived. What did he expect from her? Every time she'd catch his eyes there was a spark of something that made her heart stop, shoving it down in the pit of her stomach with the rest of her urges knotted there.
She holds her hand out between them, resting the back of it against the cushion. Non-threatening as she can make it. ]
[ Zuko’s breath catches at the request, surprised yet not. So it had been this. It wasn’t just his imagination running wild in the back of his mind, whether he allowed himself to entertain these drifting thoughts or not. He noticed a lot more about Azula lately than before, more focus on her details more frequently, physically and otherwise. The shape of her hands and face and lips and neck and such; always something caught his eye when they’ve seen each other the past couple weeks. Today was no exception. It takes him pause, glancing from her golden eyes, same golden eyes as his own, to her waiting hand, then back. To hold her hand and hold her gaze at once, though, is too overwhelming, and he feels oddly flushed in his brief hesitation before taking her hand in his without comment.
They’d idly touched plenty since being in Lunatia together; it’s not the first time even on this same couch. But neither had ever asked for it directly. He’s not sure why he hesitated at first; something felt different, palpable, something that made him swallow hard and cast his gaze aside as the Chroma flowed between their warm palms. It was always so much more intense with Azula, more than anyone else, the electric sensation he felt whenever they touched, even through clothes. Because they’re family, he thought, but it’s far more intense than with Uncle, more gripping, made him feel warm and on edge, two young firebenders, siblings, maybe their complicated history — something made him extra sensitive to her effect on him physically here as much as mentally at home. Holding hands is so innocent, affectionate, simple, yet still the skin-to-skin sent an unusually strong shock through him — maybe it was just in his mind...
His grasp on her hand is firm, palms pressed flat together, but— it doesn’t feel right. It’s not enough. He glances back to her face, gaze lingering, then laces his fingers through hers comfortably, so much more comfortable than he’d expect, and leans back a little into the couch, settling in himself. That was his move, his silent consent was in just his getting comfortable, not saying a word as his eyes find the ceiling instead of his sister.
He’s in even more need of Chroma than she is at all times, exhausted always from the lack of it and all the extra shifts at the restaurant he picks up to make up for it. He’s touch-starved at home, he’s touch-starved here, and somehow just holding Azula’s hand suddenly feels like a tidal wave of the two desperations colliding, pulled by the emotional tides of the Sanguis moon. He knows neither of them wants to talk about that; that’s why she’s here. He’s so easily under her thumb, now rather literally as his own idly traces the edge of her hand, and his own Sanguis urges he swallows every month quicken his heartbeat now in a way he can’t shake off. He closes his eyes just to feel the Chroma pass, his reticence probably making this more difficult for her — for them both. But what can be said?
All that to say: it feels nice. He can’t say that, feels frozen in the small, warm flow between them, but it feels more than nice, yet still not nice enough. ]
[ She's fine with his silence, having no need for conversation whilst grappling unwelcome thoughts in her head. There's guilt, at first, how quickly he had quietly said yes as soon as he took her hand, like she was stupid for not coming to him sooner. She knew they had just been suffering alone when the solution had been simple, would be simple for maybe anyone else. The inherent nature of Chroma made it feel especially forbidden, even as they caught glimpses of the electricity that seemed to burst to life over the past few weeks with each accidental elbow brush or purposely rib nudge, unavoidable the longer they spent together. It was alluring and dangerous, a spark she thought better than to ignite even if she foolishly offered herself up during the worst of it whenever he wanted. She still remembers his incredulous text back, her first indication that she hadn't been entirely alone in imaginationland.
Azula lets out a heavy sigh, as if she was deflating, weeks of tension easing out as waves of energy flowed through her in time with the stroke of his affection thumb. It was more than she asked for, the gentleness of it, shoving down the instinct to peel away and make him forget she ever bothered. For a second, she starts to object but quickly halts, watching Zuko settle into the couch with an expression she wanted to pull apart and examine a hundred times over. So many times she had watched him when he wasn't paying attention, golden eyes memorizing how his lips pressed together when he was deep in thought, the lines in his eyebrows that formed when he scowled--
The fire princess forces her eyes shut as she swallows uncomfortably, keeping her hand limp in his as she too settles deeper into the cushions. How long did she have to sit here until it was enough? She knows it has only been a few minutes, an underlying desire driven by Sanguis tugging at the back of her mind making each passing second agony-- with Yamamoto, it had felt so immediate, but touching Zuko now only left her with a hunger barely satiated. Maybe the silence would kill her after all. ]
[ Zuko had mental gymnastics to jump through trying to make up his mind what to do. Something needs to happen, clearly. The tension is growing thick in the air after just sitting there in silence for many minutes. He didn’t remember ever holding hands with Azula like this. What is he supposed to say to the girl who was a threat on his life this time last year? The girl who’s now almost four years older, in a future she won’t reveal where their relationship clearly had improved... but he had no idea how or why. Working with that plus the need for Chroma, and the heavy physicality Sanguis always imparted on him — on them... always swallowed and starved since he first got here nearly half a year ago now... it was an overwhelming feeling and a conflicting one. It’s bizarre to think he’d been here that long and now he’s holding hands with his sister trying to decide whether or not he wants to hold her. Between alien planets, time travel, losing their firebending, getting it back in very different ways, and being just generally touch-starved under a moon that makes it almost painful not to? There were many question marks around what they should treat each other like.
But something has to happen or he’ll drive himself mad with his own silence, too. Sanguis wins out. Chroma is more compelling than his conscious right now, or any complexes or conflicts in his mind still. She came over here knowing this is something mutually beneficial, even if that wasn’t a primary thought... He doesn’t get to cuddle and touch Gokudera the way he used to now that him and Yamamoto are whatever... It’s been particularly hard — no pun intended.
He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes briefly, a gentle scowl on his face, then casting them hard to the left, away from her, as he lets out a dramatic sigh through his nose. He breaks their hands apart. He takes a short pause, unknown whether he was suddenly objecting or not, before leaning in toward her to wrap his arm around her. He’s also not forgotten one of the most bizarre details — that Azula told him she needed him. It’s a big deal. But he’s clearly in agreement, in his own way, not to make it a big deal. The Chroma sure made it feel like one, though. ]
[ His hand is gone and she's ready to flee, flooded by self-doubt that triggers her need for flight-- but he doesn't give her time. The rush is immediate, stronger, and instinctively her body sinks into his to seek out more of it. It's a whiplash of emotions, her heart beating heavy, staring in front of her instead of at him as she tries to determine what he wanted from her. What was this? Azula shifts uncomfortably, uncertain whether or not it was the affection or her own thoughts that she didn't like, swallowing dryly as she searches for something to say. There was no reprimand, nothing, leave it to Zuko to leave her incapable of words as she wrestles with herself in her head instead.
It's certainly better, she can't bring herself to pull away, justifying it by refusing to look at him. Her arm rests on his leg for lack of a better place to put it, fingers splaying out against his thigh as she tries to distract herself instead of indulge in the beckoning call of Sanguis. The tighter he held her, the worse it got. She should have had him put a movie on, but now they were in a hell she didn't know how to escape, leaning back and closing her eyes. ]
[ Zuko refuses to look at his sister, in turn, flooded with his own self-doubt. What is he doing? What does he want? He wants the flood of Sanguis sensations to go away again. It’s hard to swallow them, shoulder them month after month in silence without fulfillment, but that’s something he’s gotten used to, in private on his own without complaining about it or mentioning it to anyone how much it affected him, because it was awful. But literally leaning into the urges unfortunately does not abate and soothe them as he’d hoped, and only makes it worse. The Chroma from Azula’s hand now pressed against his thigh feels almost like a burn, too much energy right there. Why right there? His eyes are drawn at last to his lap, staring confused, distressed, at the slender fingers splayed against his leg. What did she want? To hell with whatever he wanted, because he didn’t know. This was her idea — but what was the idea?
His hand pressed against her arm feels hot, though not so much tingly as hers on his leg. He shifts in his seat uncomfortably, but it brings them closer; it only takes an inch for his leg to press itself against hers, Chroma spreading down the length of their thighs as it does. He just wanted to touch, to feel Chroma anywhere, to touch her... But he didn’t want to. But he definitely did want to, even if he also didn’t. They’d already come this far, so any innocent touching like this was surely permissible now, being met with no objection so far. Any not-so-innocent touching was a panicked flight of fancy centered between her fingers on his thigh, it felt like, and discarded as extreme.
But not as easily as any other time those flights of fancy flew by. How could it be easy to ignore what his body was screaming for? Hoping for her to move her hand one way or the other, it made his head spin. He’s consumed with confusion, guilt, resentment, relief, restrictions, deprivation, needs, wants... This was her fault. It was Azula’s fault for inviting herself over, to do this to him and still do nothing. A new way to torture him. No, it wasn’t, though. She must be feeling... something similar. He can’t blame her for coming over. It was the moon’s fault. But the moon had never targeted him for anything. Except maybe this. Right now. But as with anything, he couldn’t help but feel suspicious of his sister’s intentions, silent as they both were. He had no idea what to say or do except hold her close and avert his eyes from hers, but his gaze kept crawling back to her hand in his lap. ]
[ All she wanted was some potentially awkward hand-holding, nothing like this. His forwardness pulling her closer made her intentions hazy, judgement cloudy as the ebb and flow of Chroma only made her crave more of his touch. It was a taste of something she'd thought of before, a line she told herself she wouldn't cross-- Zuko was younger, just a little, still desperate for a relationship with her without knowing what he'd do to her back in the Fire Nation. A part of her knew she'd be taking advantage, pulling him into something twisted because of his love to help without knowing it'd be satisfying something more than a need for Chroma.
But... Azula groans as their knees knock together, the sound in the silent room startling her back to action, trying to swallow back arousal he'd sparked. She wanted him to tell her no, needing a firm boundary they'd never reach instead of agonizing over knowing how good it'd feel to have that kind of power over him, teeth dragging over her lower lip as she starts to trace an invisible pattern along the inside of his thigh with her fingertips. The princess tilts her head back, her mouth grazing his chin before she finds his lips, pulling him into a kiss. ]
[ The way her fingertips dance along the edge of the inner seam of his pants is shocking literally and figuratively, sending goosebumps racing across his skin. A short, shallow breath is audible in reaction, eyes still locked in his lap, but just as he wills himself to tear them away and back to her, she does something to widen them in an even greater shock. That, he'd not expected. None of this, but a kiss seemed unreal, even as his sister traced his thigh with kid gloves, but her lips on his makes all these twisted feelings he'd secretly wrestled with all the realer at long last. The closure between them brings closure that he'd never wanted — that he'd never wanted to want, at least. He doesn't shut his eyes, stuck open yet not quite seeing somehow, the moment shifting in such a blur. His knotted brow is nearly quivering, so uncertain in his inner conflict overwhelming him outwardly suddenly. How'd this scene escape his imagination? How'd it crawl from the darker depths of his mind into real life, into his home, into his arms? It should've stayed deep down, not even alive enough to play pretend in private... yet somehow the fantasy had grown legs, and now his sister's hand was all but between his own legs, and her lips pressed to his. Of course he felt some seductive electricity zap between them, be it the energy of the Chroma or just — Azula by her nature. The shock of it all was enough to make him pull back, but only after a fair moment together — and only by a fraction of an inch, for a fraction of a second, before confused desire overtook confused hesitation, bringing him back to her. It felt like his first kiss — that Earth Kingdom girl, whatever her name was; he knew her name, but it was the furthest from his mind now. The push and pull was ten times worse, and a hundred times better, or maybe vice versa, morally speaking. He could write it off as a simple sibling kiss; some siblings kiss on the lips, right? But... he knows it's not, and the way he shuts his eyes to kiss her back proves that. ]
[ His lips leave hers and its like all the air in her lungs goes with him, frozen for that blink of an eye of a moment, a dark desire she can't undo. No doubt they had both felt it, the boundary was crossed and the reward was so much greater, but the spark between them existed outside the realm of Chroma. How long would it be until she could finally admit that? The princess has little time to think, that moment over quickly, his mouth on hers so fast that she'd forgotten what it was like to be without it. ]
Oh, Zuko...
[ Azula purrs against his mouth in surprise, his kisses surprisingly easy to navigate, like their lips were magnets finding their way back to one another. She drags her hands over his face before she eagerly crawls into his lap, wanting to taste as much as she could before his doubts would return. ]
[ Before he's even fully aware what they're getting themselves into, Azula's closer than ever. When she sidles her way into his lap, that's much more compelling than her little circled invisible designs against his inseam. He's already leant into the feeling this far. It's too much to even break the kiss to say her name; he's not sure he wants to, and hearing her say his own struck a weird nerve, the air already thick enough with weirdness. But not too weird to stop. It felt surreal, more than anything, and like he didn't want to care. His brow furrows as her hands slide over his cheeks; no one had ever touched his face with the Chroma, and that felt extra intense. His brow furrows at the loss of it, leaving him in a new need. A cautious hand finds the small of her waist as if to steady her — or guide her — in his lap, as he pressed his lips against hers with more pressure than at first unconsciously, kisses unending. ]
[ He has a power over her that's intoxicating, a feeling that is usually masked by anger and uncertainty but only now makes it that much easier to melt into him. Even now she recognizes the relief even past the desire, curling into him with a hidden fear that he'd let her go too soon as he presses eager, heated kisses to her mouth. The princess can't help but grind into his lap, selfishly hoping he needed her just as badly, coaxing their bodies closer together. Azula regretfully parts their lips, dipping her head closer to leave a trail of kisses along his jawline before whispering a command in his ear. ]
Take me to your bedroom.
[ She wouldn't let him escape her, arms winding tight around his shoulders just in case he was thinking about it. ]
[ Zuko has no idea the power he has over her. He knows an Azula who's composed and ruthless and sees her still as the perfect, prodigy princess she once was, all-powerful innately; he knew nothing about what happened after their Agni Kai — he didn't even know about their Agni Kai! He's always susceptible to Azula's influence, but now more than ever. He feels as if under a spell, somehow outside himself, and he can't help but spread his legs further when his pants grow tighter beneath her as she moves on him like that. It's too much, far more than he'd expected, just that alone, and leaves him in shallow, quick breaths. When she leans in and starts kissing along his jawline, there was a terrifying excitement that came over him. But when she makes her demand, just a wave of terror washes over him. He has a conflicted, longing, searching look on his face, always so expressive, while he struggles inwardly and outwardly in a flash that's far too fast for him to process. His eyes dart to the left anxiously, turning away from her slightly toward the entrance, paranoid about his roommates. But he doesn't think anyone's home... Even if they were... What is he thinking? He's not; he can't.
She knows she has so much power over her brother and as it almost always happens, she uses it well. His eyes seek hers, turning back toward her with that same complex, somehow pleading, slightly dazed expression, and nods the slightest of obedient nods. This moment is a whirlwind and turning point but— they'd already passed that point, probably. He slides his hands from her waist to her thighs, and carefully lifts her with him as he stands. She's light, and he's strong, and it's like one fluid motion, almost effortless. Instinctive. He looks her straight-on, something harsh yet soft in his eyes, pausing and holding her midair for a split moment, wheels turning in his head but clearly malfunctioning. He closes his eyes and leans in for another kiss as he walks her shortly down the hall. His door was left ajar, so he gently kicks it open, not keen on breaking the kiss, and as they enter, he kicks it shut backwards rather noisily with a slam.
He feels weak pressed against his sister now, arms beneath her slightly shaking as he turns around to sit at the foot of his bed, keeping her as close as he could in his lap all the while. He leans back to lie flat against the bed, but the hot, nervous hands that had just supported her are now along her back, coaxing her down with him. His chest feels tight and he's definitely suppressing pants, ravaged with confusion and hormones and moonlight and a desire he never, ever admitted to, and now was spontaneously acting upon... His head's spinning. But clearly neither have intention of stopping if they find themselves in Zuko's bedroom at all. ]
[ Zuko being so quiet made her nervous at first, like he was doubting her, this, she'd so quickly come to terms with her desires that her need for Chroma only felt like an extra push-- but what if he hadn't wanted this at all? The nerves vanish as his hands curl around her thighs, firm, confident, her expression softening as she catches his gaze while held tight against him. It was a sweetness she didn't deserve, groaning against his mouth when his lips return to hers and he moves through the apartment to claim her.
He's on the bed and greedy, tugging her down, making her laugh out loud-- she'd always wanted to be wanted like this. She's practically cradling his face in her hands as she presses kisses to every inch of his skin she can reach, like each one was marking her territory. It was too late now to pretend this dark desire wasn't a part of her, finding it easier to touch and tease now that he accepted her, all of her, and whatever strange new show of intimacy that blossomed between them. ]
I hate your hair like this. [ Azula admits, the words low, affectionate, even as she's grazing his teeth against his cheek, dragging his lower lip between her own before stealing another kiss. ] Grow it back out.
[ One hand slinks between them, eager to feel his excitement for her as she grazes fingertips against his erection through the fabric of his pants. Even the lightest touch makes her feel hot, quickly shifting her goal to undo the clasp of his pants. ]
[ For a split second, this felt right. In a moment where she'd always wanted to be wanted like this, where he'd always wanted to be wanted like this, it seems like there's no one else who could ever possibly make sense but for them to want each other like this... They shared a twisted closeness that was sometimes beyond Zuko's own comprehension — including this current "sometimes." As she dapples his face in kisses, he feels true affection, like he's loved, like he's family...
But immediately the feeling is smeared, the fancy shattered, her next words knocking the stars from his eyes and into a different sort of haze. He liked his hair like this; he felt handsome for the first time since his punishment. Hikaru had cut it, had been dying to cut it since he first met Zuko; and now finally, Zuko'd trusted his good friend's expert eye on what's most flattering to the prince's face, and they had a whole bonding moment about it and everything — it was special, even if it was simple. It was the first time in his life Zuko had gotten to make a choice about what to do with his hair for himself, just to his own liking and no other tradition or circumstance. And he liked it, indeed. But of course Azula's first words, in this tender moment where she'd made him feel so desired and adored, were "I hate your hair like this." Even recognizing that this is Azula speaking out of affection in her way, her stark disdain and authority embarrass him, drawing a deep pout across his brow, the unexpected hurt making him seek even more kisses.
Zuko's hips buck slightly as Azula busies her hands, exhaling sharply in surprise — though he shouldn't be surprised. It's all escalating quickly, before he can even pause to think clearly. Surely Azula'd have it that way, before he can grow logical, sensible, moral doubts too quickly. She knows how to play him like a fiddle and he knows it, too; there are so many times in life where it's somehow natural and silent to fall in line with whatever Azula's doing. Usually when he falls like this... he's not doing well. But in this scenario, everything feels too good to worry about his own manipulation or morality. Azula's touch would feel electric no matter what, even if they were home, he imagines, but he can't quiet himself at the feel of the added warm surge of Chroma from her hands along his length as she frees it from his jeans. He sounds a bit breathless and a little... what's quite the word... scared? ]
[ Had she known the words would hurt his feelings, she would have kept it to herself, no intention in harming him when he'd given her so much already. It passes out of her mind quickly, stilling as he gasps her name, the sound of it making the desire in the pit of her stomach flipflop excitedly even as paralyzes her. Red stains the tip of her ears, threatening to take over the rest of her, a sick pleasure in how pliable Zuko seemed to be beneath her, giving her little reason to keep her own desire at bay as he welcomed all of it.
Golden eyes scan his face, uncomfortable with how much her name on his lips thrilled her. The princess had always thought the best sound in the world was his yelling at her in anger, in fear, but now all she wanted was that noise again, full of lust and need and? something? she couldn't quite place but she wanted to hear it again and again until she was unable to escape it. Any disgust with their situation she might have had was lost now, blinded by the love he was willing to give her. Her hands are more forceful, one tugging his pants from his hips as the other strokes the length of his cock slowly, clearly hungry to touch and claim parts of him that were still hidden from her. ]
Undressing is a two person job, Zuko.
[ Her words are hot, ready for his hands to take her with similar ferocity, needing to be convinced he wanted her just as badly. ]
gter8uihfjlkwes the latest im the worst but ily ty im sorry /)_(\
[ Her body pushes into his touch, egging him on, eager for him to take over the control she's willing to relinquish. She'd had the same nervous hesitation with Yamamoto, but with Zuko it evaporated, a confidence that made her feel guiltier. His hands were full of her and she was unable to read him, uncertain if she was even allowed to enjoy the attention he gave her, each exploratory squeeze making her more aware of the ache between her thighs.
And then he makes that noise, her head dipping forward to take advantage, dragging toothy kisses over his throat. Azula finishes the work he'd done, yanking her shirt over her head before her hands return to finish wrestling him free of his pants. ]
I'm not not a delicate flower. [ She reminds him, hoping he'd get the hint. His pants are being flung somewhere over her shoulder now, her mouth returning to lay claim to his skin, knowing she might be leaving a mark for him to obsess over later. Azula exhales, swallowing, before she continues-- ] And I'm yours to have.
[ Let her hand dip back down to coax another moan from him, no hesitation in wrapping her fingers back around his erection to return to their soft stroke. ]
[ He feels as though he might melt beneath her as she kisses his throat, feeling hot with each little bite of affection, and wriggles his legs to help her free him from his jeans on instinct. His hips sway with half-conscious need as she returns to her kisses, but her next words both strike his heart with a sudden wave of fear and make his cock twitch with a sudden wave of lust. Her fingers wrapping themselves around him again draw a sharp inhale of pleasure, even as his face is awash with worry. ]
Ah, Azula... You're my sister...
[ This far in, and now he points that out? With his hands full of her tits and her hands full of his cock, now is his moment of vague moral lucidity? She knows who she is, Zuko. He can't bring himself to outright object, so... stating a fact... as if it's up for debate... is about as close as he's getting to closing this door before it's thrust all the way open. ]
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rediscovering) wrote2019-02-16 02:14 am
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You're not even going to ask what for? This is a first.
... I'm coming.
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ffffff this took 5ever sorry
Her disheveled look was not typical of her, either, and at the sight of her a vague thought crosses his mind on why that might be, what she might need him for, also starved of Chroma this Sanguis moon himself, as usual... Suffering, as they once put it. But it’s a strange and feral blip of his heightened imagination that he quickly lets float away, discards as illogical, implausible, odd, just the influence of the moon, some random passing dark thought... he’d rather stay willfully ignorant. His heart’s beating a little faster as he opens the door, either from the lingering heat of his shower or the mounting mystery of his sister’s desperation. He doesn’t say anything to her as he lets her in, merely seeks her frazzled gaze. ]
:} you know you can never be slower than me hehe
Azula lets out a breath when he can't see her face, rolling her shoulders back as she gathers herself, reminds herself why she bothered to come at all. When she offered him Sanguis help before, his response had surprised her-- give an inch, take a mile. She stumbled on the wrong idiot to take advantage of at first, she should have just went to the one she knew how to manipulate her entire life.
But this was... something else, no desire to taunt or tease, a genuine need that she couldn't trust with anyone else. The quick end to what she had with Yamamoto and an inability to get around her mind-numbing whatever-it-was with Jude left her with little options, unable to fill the void with another stranger out of stubbornness to not fully succumb to Lunatia's curse. Building relationships was hard, it was always going to be hard for her, invisible barriers keeping her from connecting. Azula makes a beeline for the couch, dropping dramatically into the cushions before settling in. Now, she'll watch him, patting the cushion beside her. ]
Come here.
let’s say we’re extending our gratification lol
What do you want, Azula?
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[ Defensive. Her fingers twitch but she stops before hands curl into fists, keeping herself calm despite the urges she was trying to keep buried. Weeks of having a plethora of chroma had made the sudden rip of it more jolting, harder to go without than when she'd first arrived. What did he expect from her? Every time she'd catch his eyes there was a spark of something that made her heart stop, shoving it down in the pit of her stomach with the rest of her urges knotted there.
She holds her hand out between them, resting the back of it against the cushion. Non-threatening as she can make it. ]
Just hold my hand.
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They’d idly touched plenty since being in Lunatia together; it’s not the first time even on this same couch. But neither had ever asked for it directly. He’s not sure why he hesitated at first; something felt different, palpable, something that made him swallow hard and cast his gaze aside as the Chroma flowed between their warm palms. It was always so much more intense with Azula, more than anyone else, the electric sensation he felt whenever they touched, even through clothes. Because they’re family, he thought, but it’s far more intense than with Uncle, more gripping, made him feel warm and on edge, two young firebenders, siblings, maybe their complicated history — something made him extra sensitive to her effect on him physically here as much as mentally at home. Holding hands is so innocent, affectionate, simple, yet still the skin-to-skin sent an unusually strong shock through him — maybe it was just in his mind...
His grasp on her hand is firm, palms pressed flat together, but— it doesn’t feel right. It’s not enough. He glances back to her face, gaze lingering, then laces his fingers through hers comfortably, so much more comfortable than he’d expect, and leans back a little into the couch, settling in himself. That was his move, his silent consent was in just his getting comfortable, not saying a word as his eyes find the ceiling instead of his sister.
He’s in even more need of Chroma than she is at all times, exhausted always from the lack of it and all the extra shifts at the restaurant he picks up to make up for it. He’s touch-starved at home, he’s touch-starved here, and somehow just holding Azula’s hand suddenly feels like a tidal wave of the two desperations colliding, pulled by the emotional tides of the Sanguis moon. He knows neither of them wants to talk about that; that’s why she’s here. He’s so easily under her thumb, now rather literally as his own idly traces the edge of her hand, and his own Sanguis urges he swallows every month quicken his heartbeat now in a way he can’t shake off. He closes his eyes just to feel the Chroma pass, his reticence probably making this more difficult for her — for them both. But what can be said?
All that to say: it feels nice. He can’t say that, feels frozen in the small, warm flow between them, but it feels more than nice, yet still not nice enough. ]
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Azula lets out a heavy sigh, as if she was deflating, weeks of tension easing out as waves of energy flowed through her in time with the stroke of his affection thumb. It was more than she asked for, the gentleness of it, shoving down the instinct to peel away and make him forget she ever bothered. For a second, she starts to object but quickly halts, watching Zuko settle into the couch with an expression she wanted to pull apart and examine a hundred times over. So many times she had watched him when he wasn't paying attention, golden eyes memorizing how his lips pressed together when he was deep in thought, the lines in his eyebrows that formed when he scowled--
The fire princess forces her eyes shut as she swallows uncomfortably, keeping her hand limp in his as she too settles deeper into the cushions. How long did she have to sit here until it was enough? She knows it has only been a few minutes, an underlying desire driven by Sanguis tugging at the back of her mind making each passing second agony-- with Yamamoto, it had felt so immediate, but touching Zuko now only left her with a hunger barely satiated. Maybe the silence would kill her after all. ]
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But something has to happen or he’ll drive himself mad with his own silence, too. Sanguis wins out. Chroma is more compelling than his conscious right now, or any complexes or conflicts in his mind still. She came over here knowing this is something mutually beneficial, even if that wasn’t a primary thought... He doesn’t get to cuddle and touch Gokudera the way he used to now that him and Yamamoto are whatever... It’s been particularly hard — no pun intended.
He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes briefly, a gentle scowl on his face, then casting them hard to the left, away from her, as he lets out a dramatic sigh through his nose. He breaks their hands apart. He takes a short pause, unknown whether he was suddenly objecting or not, before leaning in toward her to wrap his arm around her. He’s also not forgotten one of the most bizarre details — that Azula told him she needed him. It’s a big deal. But he’s clearly in agreement, in his own way, not to make it a big deal. The Chroma sure made it feel like one, though. ]
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It's certainly better, she can't bring herself to pull away, justifying it by refusing to look at him. Her arm rests on his leg for lack of a better place to put it, fingers splaying out against his thigh as she tries to distract herself instead of indulge in the beckoning call of Sanguis. The tighter he held her, the worse it got. She should have had him put a movie on, but now they were in a hell she didn't know how to escape, leaning back and closing her eyes. ]
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His hand pressed against her arm feels hot, though not so much tingly as hers on his leg. He shifts in his seat uncomfortably, but it brings them closer; it only takes an inch for his leg to press itself against hers, Chroma spreading down the length of their thighs as it does. He just wanted to touch, to feel Chroma anywhere, to touch her... But he didn’t want to. But he definitely did want to, even if he also didn’t. They’d already come this far, so any innocent touching like this was surely permissible now, being met with no objection so far. Any not-so-innocent touching was a panicked flight of fancy centered between her fingers on his thigh, it felt like, and discarded as extreme.
But not as easily as any other time those flights of fancy flew by. How could it be easy to ignore what his body was screaming for? Hoping for her to move her hand one way or the other, it made his head spin. He’s consumed with confusion, guilt, resentment, relief, restrictions, deprivation, needs, wants... This was her fault. It was Azula’s fault for inviting herself over, to do this to him and still do nothing. A new way to torture him. No, it wasn’t, though. She must be feeling... something similar. He can’t blame her for coming over. It was the moon’s fault. But the moon had never targeted him for anything. Except maybe this. Right now. But as with anything, he couldn’t help but feel suspicious of his sister’s intentions, silent as they both were. He had no idea what to say or do except hold her close and avert his eyes from hers, but his gaze kept crawling back to her hand in his lap. ]
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But... Azula groans as their knees knock together, the sound in the silent room startling her back to action, trying to swallow back arousal he'd sparked. She wanted him to tell her no, needing a firm boundary they'd never reach instead of agonizing over knowing how good it'd feel to have that kind of power over him, teeth dragging over her lower lip as she starts to trace an invisible pattern along the inside of his thigh with her fingertips. The princess tilts her head back, her mouth grazing his chin before she finds his lips, pulling him into a kiss. ]
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Oh, Zuko...
[ Azula purrs against his mouth in surprise, his kisses surprisingly easy to navigate, like their lips were magnets finding their way back to one another. She drags her hands over his face before she eagerly crawls into his lap, wanting to taste as much as she could before his doubts would return. ]
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Take me to your bedroom.
[ She wouldn't let him escape her, arms winding tight around his shoulders just in case he was thinking about it. ]
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She knows she has so much power over her brother and as it almost always happens, she uses it well. His eyes seek hers, turning back toward her with that same complex, somehow pleading, slightly dazed expression, and nods the slightest of obedient nods. This moment is a whirlwind and turning point but— they'd already passed that point, probably. He slides his hands from her waist to her thighs, and carefully lifts her with him as he stands. She's light, and he's strong, and it's like one fluid motion, almost effortless. Instinctive. He looks her straight-on, something harsh yet soft in his eyes, pausing and holding her midair for a split moment, wheels turning in his head but clearly malfunctioning. He closes his eyes and leans in for another kiss as he walks her shortly down the hall. His door was left ajar, so he gently kicks it open, not keen on breaking the kiss, and as they enter, he kicks it shut backwards rather noisily with a slam.
He feels weak pressed against his sister now, arms beneath her slightly shaking as he turns around to sit at the foot of his bed, keeping her as close as he could in his lap all the while. He leans back to lie flat against the bed, but the hot, nervous hands that had just supported her are now along her back, coaxing her down with him. His chest feels tight and he's definitely suppressing pants, ravaged with confusion and hormones and moonlight and a desire he never, ever admitted to, and now was spontaneously acting upon... His head's spinning. But clearly neither have intention of stopping if they find themselves in Zuko's bedroom at all. ]
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He's on the bed and greedy, tugging her down, making her laugh out loud-- she'd always wanted to be wanted like this. She's practically cradling his face in her hands as she presses kisses to every inch of his skin she can reach, like each one was marking her territory. It was too late now to pretend this dark desire wasn't a part of her, finding it easier to touch and tease now that he accepted her, all of her, and whatever strange new show of intimacy that blossomed between them. ]
I hate your hair like this. [ Azula admits, the words low, affectionate, even as she's grazing his teeth against his cheek, dragging his lower lip between her own before stealing another kiss. ] Grow it back out.
[ One hand slinks between them, eager to feel his excitement for her as she grazes fingertips against his erection through the fabric of his pants. Even the lightest touch makes her feel hot, quickly shifting her goal to undo the clasp of his pants. ]
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But immediately the feeling is smeared, the fancy shattered, her next words knocking the stars from his eyes and into a different sort of haze. He liked his hair like this; he felt handsome for the first time since his punishment. Hikaru had cut it, had been dying to cut it since he first met Zuko; and now finally, Zuko'd trusted his good friend's expert eye on what's most flattering to the prince's face, and they had a whole bonding moment about it and everything — it was special, even if it was simple. It was the first time in his life Zuko had gotten to make a choice about what to do with his hair for himself, just to his own liking and no other tradition or circumstance. And he liked it, indeed. But of course Azula's first words, in this tender moment where she'd made him feel so desired and adored, were "I hate your hair like this." Even recognizing that this is Azula speaking out of affection in her way, her stark disdain and authority embarrass him, drawing a deep pout across his brow, the unexpected hurt making him seek even more kisses.
Zuko's hips buck slightly as Azula busies her hands, exhaling sharply in surprise — though he shouldn't be surprised. It's all escalating quickly, before he can even pause to think clearly. Surely Azula'd have it that way, before he can grow logical, sensible, moral doubts too quickly. She knows how to play him like a fiddle and he knows it, too; there are so many times in life where it's somehow natural and silent to fall in line with whatever Azula's doing. Usually when he falls like this... he's not doing well. But in this scenario, everything feels too good to worry about his own manipulation or morality. Azula's touch would feel electric no matter what, even if they were home, he imagines, but he can't quiet himself at the feel of the added warm surge of Chroma from her hands along his length as she frees it from his jeans. He sounds a bit breathless and a little... what's quite the word... scared? ]
Ah— A-Azula...
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Golden eyes scan his face, uncomfortable with how much her name on his lips thrilled her. The princess had always thought the best sound in the world was his yelling at her in anger, in fear, but now all she wanted was that noise again, full of lust and need and? something? she couldn't quite place but she wanted to hear it again and again until she was unable to escape it. Any disgust with their situation she might have had was lost now, blinded by the love he was willing to give her. Her hands are more forceful, one tugging his pants from his hips as the other strokes the length of his cock slowly, clearly hungry to touch and claim parts of him that were still hidden from her. ]
Undressing is a two person job, Zuko.
[ Her words are hot, ready for his hands to take her with similar ferocity, needing to be convinced he wanted her just as badly. ]
gter8uihfjlkwes the latest im the worst but ily ty im sorry /)_(\
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And then he makes that noise, her head dipping forward to take advantage, dragging toothy kisses over his throat. Azula finishes the work he'd done, yanking her shirt over her head before her hands return to finish wrestling him free of his pants. ]
I'm not not a delicate flower. [ She reminds him, hoping he'd get the hint. His pants are being flung somewhere over her shoulder now, her mouth returning to lay claim to his skin, knowing she might be leaving a mark for him to obsess over later. Azula exhales, swallowing, before she continues-- ] And I'm yours to have.
[ Let her hand dip back down to coax another moan from him, no hesitation in wrapping her fingers back around his erection to return to their soft stroke. ]
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Ah, Azula... You're my sister...
[ This far in, and now he points that out? With his hands full of her tits and her hands full of his cock, now is his moment of vague moral lucidity? She knows who she is, Zuko. He can't bring himself to outright object, so... stating a fact... as if it's up for debate... is about as close as he's getting to closing this door before it's thrust all the way open. ]
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